Butterflies
by nancystagerat
Summary: Remus Lupin is in love. It's just taken him a while to let himself be loved in return. Set three weeks ish after HBP.


**A/N: And the fluffy RemusTonks fanfiction continues... Nothing like were-puppy love!**

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"Finally pink again, are we?"

Tonks flinched, grinning, as Remus' hand landed heavily on top of her head, ruffling itself through her unruly hair. So, he'd decided to actually _use_ the key to her flat she'd given him, she noted with a wave of excitement. Well, the butterflies in her stomach had noticed it first, but that was a different story.

"Stoppit, you! You're squashing all my lovely spikes."

He ran his fingers through the soft strands one more time, just to be thorough, before settling in beside her on the sofa. A pleasant shiver raced up Tonks' spine as she leant her head back against his palm; he hadn't pulled away. In fact, he went so far as to wrap his arms around her waist, settling her comfortably against his chest. The butterflies already inside her seemed to have multiplied into a colony in that instant, and a rowdy one at that. But it was a pleasing sort of flurry, one she wouldn't have traded for anything less than a pony.

_Or a key to_ his_ flat…_

Tonks beat the thought back from her brain; now was not the time. She'd never expected being close to him would take so much getting used to, nor that he would fall back into touching her with such ease after a year of forced separation. What was it, two, three weeks since they'd really been together?

"I mean it, you. Those spikes actually took some effort." Her hand swatted at his fingers absently flattening the hair at the back of her head. "Can you blame me for wanting to look nice for you?"

The rumble of the laugh deep in his throat set her breath so far back in her lungs the bloody air refused to _leave_.

"Terribly sorry, dear, is that what it was? I'd just thought you'd spent your morning routine bereft of a hairbrush." He chuckled when she swatted him again.

"Brat." Scrunching up her face in concentration, she straightened the rumpled pink strands so they fell in neat waves around her features, and flashed him a self-satisfied grin. "Since when have I ever needed a hairbrush?"

How he'd untied his tongue enough to speak after taking in that smile of hers, Remus would never know. But the surprise on her face was delightful when he bent his neck to bring her closer to him. "I stand corrected."

Slowly, too slowly, she felt her eyes flutter closed as the tip of his nose traced her cheekbone. They both felt her back tense and the breath hitch in her throat. Ever the gentleman, his voice broke the moment, husky feeling underlined with concern, and she opened her eyes. "Are you alright?"

It took a moment for her to realize what he'd said before nodding, the answer almost breathless in her throat. "Yeah, I mean…wow…"

Amusement at her barely-concealed fluster showing on his face, Remus smirked. Though mindful of the ribbing he'd implied with that smile, Tonks found herself absorbed by it. For the longest time, she'd wanted to see those fine laugh lines around his eyes. All the better that they'd shown themselves especially for her.

"Too much just yet? Pity," he said, all trace of the chivalrous Gryffindor gone. She really was adorable when she blushed, he thought, and his inner Marauder sought to make the pink roses blooming on her face match her vibrant hair. "I thought you aurors got trained to handle anything that comes your way."

"No! Not at all! You--I mean, yes, I'm trained for that, you bleeding git--"

Replying too quickly was hardly a part of the suave, collected approach she'd planned out, but it had the same effect in the end; she would just have to convince herself he found her awkwardness endearing.

The smirk spread farther across his mouth, and Tonks found herself wondering if she should be afraid, only to be pleasantly surprised and appalled with herself as he nuzzled the side of her face. Shying away from the tickling sensation he'd left against her skin, her face had fallen open, and she was one hundred and sixteen percent sure she'd displayed her shock and embarrassment and insatiable joy to all of England, let alone to the wonderful terrible man who'd just done the nuzzling. The fact that they were the only two in the flat notwithstanding, of course.

His smirk had widened into a full-bodied beam, albeit a sly one. She was so easy to read, not to mention easy on the eyes.

"Apparently your training was lacking a bit, my dear, if I can put you this far off your game."

She gave his shoulder a shove and pushed herself up. "That's it, no more of this lets-embarrass-the-auror for you, mister. Gitoff me!"

No way was he about to let her off that easy. She hadn't even registered the mischief in his face when he'd swung her up and dumped her with a squeal back onto the sofa, ignoring her cries of "What the bleeding hell--? Cut it out! Let me g—_Remus_!"

Oh dear God, he was kissing her neck and it _tickled_.

That just wasn't _fair_.

She was laughing now, her face turning the lovely ruddy pink he'd previously intended, and he was enjoying himself far too much to let her stop. He went so far as to venture down and kiss along her collarbone, trailing his lips along the curve between her shoulder and neck. Her hands were braced on his shoulders, making as if to push him off and holding him there instead. And his own resident butterflies weren't helping, either.

"You're terrible."

He smiled against her skin. "Au contraire, m'love, if you hadn't been wearing such a tempting off-the-shoulder getup it would never have planted such awful ideas in my head and you wouldn't be getting the daylights kissed out of you right now."

She brought a hand up to rest it on his head, taking her turn to ruffle the hair that fell in a maddening, adorable mess across his forehead. The man baffled her. He really did. She was at a loss as to how, after months and months of pushing her away, all his arguments for why she shouldn't love him could just vanish. The night Dumbledore died, the shock they'd all felt, and seeing the slashes on Bill Weasley's face she knew had had something to do with it, but that couldn't have been the whole reason…could it?

"_Merlin_, Remus--" The kisses he was leaving in the dip below her throat were making it quite hard for Tonks to string two thoughts together. "--what brought this on?"

He looked up at that, regarding her seriously for the first time that afternoon. The sigh that left his lungs seemed to rattle from deep in his bones, taking with it all the fears and doubts and idiotic reasons he'd ever fabricated for denying he could ever live without her. He knew better now, and nothing short of the full moon would ever keep him from her again.

"I stopped trying to kid myself." He raked a hand through his hair, breaking eye contact. All of a sudden he felt old. "I…I spent a long time thinking, that night in the hospital wing. Seeing Bill, and then hearing about Dumbledore…" He could feel her eyes on him. "It made me realize how little time we may have left."

The thought was sobering for the both of them. They may not have much time at all, what with He Who Must Not Be Named gaining power, marshaling forces across the wizarding world. And with them both working for the Order, at the risk of sounding morbid, either of them might die at any time; it was the nature of the job, their own natures as well. Voldemort's defeat was more important. It always would be. And the fate of a single pair of lovers meant very little in the grand scheme of things.

"I realized…I've spent my whole life pushing others away, trying to keep them safe, telling myself I couldn't let someone love me because of what I am. It took you to show me that people don't always need protection. And it's better to spend the last days in love…accepting love, giving it back to someone, than dying with the regret of knowing I made an unbelievable woman's life darker by denying her."

She flushed again, unused to the attention, but feeling it swell in her heart all the same. Her warm, callused palm against his face brought his gaze back to hers. "Remus, I don't understand how anyone could _not_ love you." Pink hair mingling with gray-streaked brown, she pressed her forehead to his. "Makes me feel like the luckiest woman alive that I'm the one you chose to love back." She kissed the line between his brows, smiling into the gentle brown eyes that always made her insides melt all the way to her toes. "Or I'm just a terrible guilt trip."

Merlin, she loved the light dancing in those eyes. Loved that he'd let her bring that light to him. Loved that he'd brought back her own light.

"That could've had something to do with it, too."

Tonks matched his grin to the T, angling her face to meet the kiss he finally meant for her lips. "If it did, I'm not sorry."

And the butterflies were at it again, dancing all through and around them in a lovely, pink cloud of sheer, unutterable bliss.

"Nope, not sorry at all."


End file.
